I think “Things No One Tells You…” might just be a regular series on Mamademics, since they are not only the most popular posts but they are also the most fun for me to write. So far, I’ve covered Pregnancy and Postpartum; and this week I will cover breastfeeding. I’m thinking of doing posts on labor/delivery, marriage, graduate school, teaching, and life with a newborn. Seriously, the list is potentially endless.
1. It is painful
Yes I know they tell you that when you first start it may be painful until you have the correct latch and it takes some getting used too. I’m not talking about that pain. I’m talking about the pain you feel after your milk makes it appearance. I talked about this briefly in the postpartum blog—remember I described engorgement as painfully rock hard breasts that feel like electrical currents are being set off inside them every time your baby cries… yea it’s painful.
2. Your appetite will be insatiable
What does every mommy want to do after having a baby? Lose weight. The good news is breastfeeding helps you lose weight, but the bad news is you cannot diet. Remember when you used the “I’m eating for two” excuse while pregnant to justify eating two servings of EVERYTHING. Well you used that excuse prematurely, because technically you were not eating for two at that point, but you are now. Every time we take Baby S to the pediatrician his doctor asks me if I’m eating enough and reminds me that I should not try to diet right now. Dude even if I wanted to diet right now it would be impossible, because I am seriously NEVER full. I eat the same portion sizes as my husband who is a foot taller than me, and I always want more. If I didn’t try to sleep when Baby S sleeps, I would snack constantly. I thought my appetite was crazy when I was pregnant, but not only has it increased I actually have room for everything I eat, because there’s no longer a little munchkin inside taking up all the room.
3. It can make you sick
This really should have been my number one thing, but I didn’t want to scare people right away. No one and I mean NO ONE warned me about the possibility of mastitis. What is mastitis? Mastitis is an infection of the mammary glands and is almost always found in lactating women. So how do you get this pesky infection? You get it from clogged milk ducts, which are also common in breastfeeding women. Mastitis makes you feel like you have the flu think chills and a fever. The infected breast will be red and hard to the touch.
Let’s think about this not only are you already exhausted because you aren’t getting any sleep, but you now have an infection that causes you to feel even more rundown, and you are in PAIN! How do I know so much about this pesky infection? Well as luck would have it I had it not once, but twice in the first month of Baby S’ life. Both times I was treated with antibiotics and told to use warm compresses and to continue nursing. The first time I had to continue expressing milk, because Baby S wouldn’t latch, but halfway through my treatment the second time he successfully latched w/ nipple shields and helped me drain the infected breast faster and better than my breast pump.
4. You are an on demand feeding machine
You will go from being a human incubator to a human milk machine. I have a new found respect for cows and I’m seriously considering limiting my dairy intake, because I feel so badly for the poor animals. I mean I’m only feeding one tiny human by choice, but cows feed their young and millions of people by force. My son eats every two to three hours, and if he’s going through a growth spurt he cluster feeds in the evenings every 30 to 45 minutes. I don’t even know why I bother wearing a shirt between the hours of 6 pm and 10 pm right now, because as soon as I readjust myself he is ready to go again. Of course I am also starving at these times, but the good thing is my husband is home and can get me snacks and lots of water. If his cluster feeding times ever change, I’ll have to prepare snacks beforehand.
5. It is HARD!!!
Yes, breastfeeding is a natural way of feeding your child, but it is hard. All babies are not the same and all breasts do not work the same. Yes some babies will latch perfectly right away and you will wonder why more women don’t breastfeed, but that’s not the story for everyone. No one ever tells you about the very real learning curve that takes place. I spent 3.5 weeks pumping milk, because my son could/would not latch successfully and it lead to longer engorgement, mastitis, lack of even more sleep, and feeling of inadequacy. While I had no problem developing a milk supply, this is not always the case for other women. I found it ironic that my milk supply was plentiful and my son wasn’t latching, while other women have babies who latch but they do not produce enough milk initially.
Breastfeeding is also hard, because you are literally tied to your baby 100% of the time initially. Not only are you their protector, but you’re their only food source for the first six months of their lives. You have to eat enough for not only yourself, but also for your child; and you can’t just eat any ol’ thing…well you shouldn’t. You need to eat lots of green leafy vegetables and drink tons of water. You should still be taking your prenatal vitamins (I forget a lot :-/) and if you are worried about maintaining a healthy supply I strongly encourage you drink mother’s milk tea and take fenugreek supplements.
So, why do it?
With all that being said, I know some people are wondering why in the world would anyone still breastfeed, and I can only answer for myself. I chose to keep at it because it is the best thing for my son. I will always try to do the best thing for him. There were many times when I was ready to give up, because the pain was too much and I just wanted to be able to sleep after giving him a bottle, but I had a great support system. If you do decide to breastfeed and you are having a hard time, DO NOT give up! Contact your local La Leche chapter. I went to a local meeting and the help and phone support made a difference for me. Talk to other moms who have breastfed or are currently breastfeeding. Both my mother and mother-in-law breastfed and encouraged me to keep trying. I also had several conversations via the Mamademics FB fan page on the subject, and received so many phone calls, text messages, and emails from women who have been there or are currently there. Let your partner help as much as he possibly can. My husband would feed the baby for me while I pumped when he wasn’t at work, so that I could get some sleep. He also helped me by reminding me the different holds we saw during class. The most important thing he did was encourage me to not give up and remind me that I was doing a good job. Baby S is now six weeks old and it is the most amazing feeling to know that I am able to nurture him. While I often joke about how often he eats, I enjoy our nursing sessions. I love to see his face once he triggers a “let down” and he looks up at me with big loving eyes once his hunger has been quenched.
And while I am a strong supporter of breastfeeding, I do understand that it may not happen for every woman. Don’t beat yourself up if you’re one of those women, because trying is better than nothing; and breastfeeding isn’t the only way to bond with your child. You are still an awesome mother J
What have your breastfeeding experiences been like? Let’s talk in the comments.
P.S. I had to stop twice while writing this post to feed him and he’s currently fussing as I try to wrap it up; so I’ll have to proofread later.
